I made a shidduch last week! I redt shidduchim daily and this was the first successful shidduch where I did not know either side before I saw their resumes. I had reached out to the kallah’s mother about her son and he was busy so she told me about her daughter. I thought of the chosson from seeing his resume on Ezer Kenegdo. When the kallah’s mother told me about her daughter I quickly found her profile on Ezer Kenegdo as well and I went for it! The shidduch had been redt a few years ago but it wasn’t nagoya then, and this round they went out BH. The chosson is a relative of another shidduch I made and I greatly enjoyed working with his relative’s family. BOTH mothers in this shidduch were sweet, kind, and appreciative. One mother sent me an Amazon gift card after the second date, just to thank me for my time and then after a few more dates I received a gift tray from The Nuttery for Shabbos! I live in Milwaukee…this w
as such a treat!!! My kids also felt like they were rewarded for their sacrifice of time and attention when I am working on a shidduch. Attention parents of singles: Send chocolate to people who work on your kids’ shidduchim!! It goes a long way! Verbal praise and appreciation is also greatly valued :).
Batay Yisroel is on my mind constantly. The Levin and Kaplan Families took the greatest pain and cultivated a movement that is so far reaching, it comes up at shabbos meals and in teachers’ lounges. They are true role models of resiliency and taking from their own trauma to help Klal Yisroel. The emails and initiatives are amazing and I am so excited when I hear other people being osek in shidduchim. We ALL need to keep trying to think of ideas. If you can’t redt an idea because of time or other barriers, have someone else do it! Call your Rav, Rebbetzin, friendly neighbor. It does take courage, but it is so worth it.
I have to credit R’ Shalom Blatter who spends his days and nights organizing, assembling, emailing and advocating for singles. I spoke to him over Sukkos and he told me point blank: “Mrs. Hellman, if you are involved with shidduchim you may not do any other chesed! Other people can make meals and give tzedakah, YOU must do this!!” I kept hearing his voice in my head and trying to think of ideas. When I sent a list to Batay Yisroel yesterday, I started to realize how hard I try. My family has experienced personal yeshuos from being osek in this incredible mitzvah and I encourage every person to take a risk and redt a shidduch. Any part that you have in the story brings bracha and yeshua into your lives…you truly are a partner with Hashem. May this special mitzvah continue to be a zechus for Yisroel a’h and Elisheva a’h and may their families continue this incredible Avodas HaKodesh and nechama from their pain.